Sheet 3

  • "You start sheet 2 and I'll start sheet 3 and we'll meet somewhere in the middle..." -Stel speaking to Mo.
  • " 'Kittens,' said the duchess" -Martin Carter (aka Martin Clartin)
  • "mmmmmmmminty!" -Hale and Pace on a Clorets advert.
  • "Can I take you Estella?" -Pip, of Great Expectations fame.
  • "I'm from Hackney. Fancy a shag?" -Jo Brand
  • "What a shame that Norman Wisdom's dead" -Ray (aka Rob Newman)
  • "I got chased by a police helicopter!" -Mark Bewick
  • "Gods, but I could do with a piss!" -Helm, aka King Phillip
  • "Me and Ren..." -Mark Bewick on many occassions
  • "Jab, jab" -Richard Loxley (on Mr Griffiths in Latin lessons)
  • "It's a game of two halves" -Jimmy Hill on football
  • "Mr Leonard is a twat" -Matthew Hearn relates
  • "I've had Mr Porritt and Mr Leonard all in one year which makes maths a more daunting subject because they're both crap." -David Anderson confides
  • "Oh Christ, I've left the iron on!" -from Smith & Jones
  • "Scare the testicles off ya!" -Nick talking to C.M.C-H.
  • "Why stop just when I'm hating it" -Marvin (Dougie-babes)
  • "If everyone had shorter cars, traffic jams would be shorter." -Simmance being philosophical...
  • "That young girl is one of the least beknightedly unintelligent organic lifeforms it has been my profound lack of pleasure not to be able to avoid meeting." -Marvin (again!)
  • "When the party was founded, many voters went into Labour" -Doc Mains talking about Labour.
  • "Rassoul, stop playing with Worthington's tube!" -Doc.
  • "Talking about sex can give you hang-ups" -HHHBaker
  • "Yes it is" -C.M.C-H. on Pantera's Fucking Hostile song
  • "Nidlenodlenoo" -Jon Burley on many occassions.
  • "That's classified information, creep!" -Joe Dredd on what he wanted to be when he grew up (aka Judge Dredd).
  • "It's all right - we've got long ones..." -Umm, me actually!
  • "I've got one..." -Well, yes! Chris Softley actually!
  • "Hello everybody, I'm a beetroot" -Me, doing an impression of what someone who was blushing might say...
  • "Do any of you want to take part in the sixth form gambling den?" -Anon... well actually, G.P.B-M.
  • "Life is just a string of quotes." -Me, laughing
  • "Truths are often spoken with electrodes on the scrotum"
  • "If you come, you have to remember to bring your own filling..." -Schoolgirl overheard on Metro
  • "He made me reveal what my mother never knew about my first career..." -Miriam Hodgson
  • "If the prodding should come from anywhere, it should come from them and not us..." -Elizabeth III
  • "To err is human. To really foul things up requires a computer." -Paul Ehrlich on technology!
  • "FCK - the only thing missing is you!" -Sara's T-shirt
  • "Do you want to run down to London, and beg Blue Peter to have us on?" -Clare to Stel (?!?)
  • "Charlotte - that's enough..... Oh no! Don't hold that against me!" -Mo, sounding a might suspicious...
  • "Hey! Why don't I just sprout wings and fly!" -Stel on the patented "Stel-two-tier-system". Well!
  • "I really can't expect you guys to put this thing together..." -Elizabeth III murmurs philosophically
  • "Come on everybody" -Peter Pan on a musical book.
  • "C-C-Come on everybody" -Ditto, but with a noticeable stutter.
  • "It's going to outgrow its pot!" -Clare on Chuck-a-dee.
  • "I'm a Martian lovechild" -Mo. Err sorry, that's wrong! It's actually, "I'm Timmy Bolta's love child!" (HMMMM...) [SEE SHEET TWO....]

    SHEET 2 | SHEET 4

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